Moving an Aging Parent from Long-Distance – Part XII


Here comes the fun part - gathering my sisters and Mom for an apartment-shopping excursion.  Since we choose mid-week to accomplish this goal, I take a day-off work because that’s the only time everyone else is available. I had promised myself early on that I will be selective regarding the number of days I do not report for work knowing full well that choosing eldercare over work can and will get out of hand if I don’t manage my personal/vacation days right now.

Mom is extremely cost-conscience and we choose to shop at furniture outlets that won’t break the bank: Costco, Ashley Furniture, Ikea, JC Penny, Hobby Lobby, Home Decorators, Marshall’s, TJ Maxx,  and Value City Furniture. We discover that there are plenty of wonderful selections for every room in the house at every store. Ultimately, the decision on where we made our final purchases was based on the amount of money the company was going to charge us to deliver the furniture. We discovered huge discrepancies and ended up buying most of the furniture from one store (Value City) and saved a lot of money on delivery charges.

Mom has specific ideas on how she wants to decorate her apartment and I’m all in favor of keeping her in the driver’s seat. To make the process as easy as possible for her, I took photos of her apartment ahead of time and carried them with me on my IPhone. I also pre-measured the rooms, walls, window heights, nooks and crannies, and recorded those measurements as well. As we shopped we kept referring to the photos and measurements so ensure that the items will fit into the apartment.

As grueling as any long shopping day can be, I see Mom is clearly enjoying the process – especially since it includes being with her three daughters all day long. It was fun and one of those memorable days. Seeing Mom this happy warms my heart.

At the day’s end we’re all exhausted and content that buying the substantial pieces of furniture is behind us. My sisters go their separate ways, and Mom comes home with me to enjoy the family’s company for a few more days before she heads back to Florida.

Sunday morning, Mom and I are reenergized and in the mood for more shopping. This time our shopping list includes smaller items like lamps, table cloths, wall hangings, and pillows. We head for Wal-Mart.

Watching Mom shop is a delight, and I observe a change in her for the better. At the beginning of the move process, she was frail and vulnerable and unsure of herself. Today she’s assertive and more demanding. She wants what she wants and is eager for the move to go smoothly.  I’m enjoying watching this transformation in Mom.

And there we were, in the tablecloth isle at Wal-Mart, when my phone rang. I notice that the caller is Mom’s real estate agent, Sharon Kerr. I’m wondering why in the world she’s calling me early on a Sunday morning. This can’t be good news. And it’s not.

I answer the phone and listen intently as Sharon tells me the buyer of the house has backed out of the deal. Both Sharon and I are at a loss of words and I hide my face from Mom. This situation is going to crush Mom (and Bill) and I must somehow prepare them for this devastating news.  I say nothing to Mom as I hang up the phone with Sharon. My heart is breaking for her.


5 Responses

  1. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by steve Joyce. steve Joyce said: From EldercareABC-- Moving an Aging Parent from Long-Distance – Part XII: Here comes the fun part – gathering my s... [...]
  2. Here is a thought to save money on the expense of moving an elderly payment, instead of hiring a professional mover to handle the entire move, rent a truck on your own and hire the mover from both locations to load the truck, could save thousands with this approach -- Thanks and Regards Noel for <a href="" rel="nofollow">moving companies</a>
  3. [...] Qui viene la parte divertente - raccogliere le mie sorelle e la mamma per una escursione appartamento-shopping. Dal momento che abbiamo scelto a metà settimana per raggiungere questo obiettivo, prendo un lavoro a giorni alterni perché questa è l'unica volta che tutti gli altri è disponibile. Mi ero ripromesso che presto sarò selettiva per quanto riguarda il numero di [giorni. . . ] URL articolo originale [...]
  4. [...] Voici la partie amusante - collecte de mes sœurs et ma mère pour une excursion appartement-achat. Depuis que nous choisissons en milieu de semaine pour atteindre ce but, je prends une journée de travail à pied parce que c'est le seul moment où tout le monde d'autre n'est disponible. Je m'étais promis dès le début que je vais être sélectifs en ce qui concerne le nombre de [jours. . . ] URL article original: [...]
  5. I think you bring this story to life and it is one I can relate to - My parents moved 3 years ago out of necessity from a large home on several acres to a level inner city precinct home of their rehional town. There were so many things to consider and do. Some of my siblings got very frazzled but I always wanted my Mum in the drivers seat during the process. She is a full time carer for my father and thus makes all the major decisons but not without a lot of support and "talk" with her husband and children along the way. Thank goodness you were there when your Mum was confronted with the roadblock.... Kerrie
  6. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by steve Joyce. steve Joyce said: From EldercareABC-- Moving an Aging Parent from Long-Distance – Part XII: Here comes the fun part – gathering my s... [...]
  7. Rob
    [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by steve Joyce. steve Joyce said: From EldercareABC-- Moving an Aging Parent from Long-Distance – Part XII: Here comes the fun part – gathering my s... [...]
  8. In this day and age, we are living longer and longer. As we grow, our lives take us in many directions...born in Georgia, raised in Texas and now living in New Jersey can put some distance between you and your loved ones. But distance will not stop the aging process, and our loved ones will become more fragile and will need someone to look over them. If a nursing home is not an option, then moving in with the family or to an apartment nearby is a perfect solution. Moving is a difficult task at any age, but particularly most challenging when you're elderly. The good news is, that technology has also grown in the moving and storage industry and a family member can do all the research, planning, , scheduling, hiring, packing, loading and driving from the convenience of their own home. When researching moving companies, look for companies that specialize in senior citizen moves. These companies have a team of professional movers that cater and attend to the special needs of the elderly. Ultimately, wouldn't you want a mover that would act as if they where moving their very own grandmother? Thanks and Regards The Moving Expert for <a href="" rel="nofollow">long distance moving</a>

Leave a comment