Moving a Parent Long Distance Blog Summary – Part 7

By Joy Loverde

Mom and Bill’s long-distance move from Florida to Chicago taught me numerous invaluable family-caregiving lessons which I wrote about in twenty-four blogs. I’d like to share with you the highlights of what I learned in the hopes that you can bypass some of the unexpected twists and turns of the aging parent relocation process.

  • Getting parents packed up will require a series of on-site visits by anyone who has committed to help in the move process. If they do not step up to the plate, be prepared to hound them.
  • The clearer you are in dictating your needs and the needs of your parents, the better tasks will get done according to plan. Be specific when asking for help.
  • There are several lessons to be learned here at the beginning of the house-sale process:   Number one... if power-of-attorney has not been established head for the lawyer’s office immediately. Number two... if power-of-attorney has already been established ask to see the ORIGINAL copies of the power-of-attorney documents otherwise how will you know if the documents really exist?
  • When you are moving a parent from long distance and there’s a house to sell, limit the time between the pending sale and closing date to avert the possibility of the buyer backing out.
  • Every eldercare situation comes with twists and turns. Illness, accidents, and backfired plans can and will happen right in the middle of a long-distance move. Do not let that stop you from staying on track. In fact, get used to the idea of change being around every corner, and you will not be so taken back when it happens.  Rely on your resilience and resourcefulness to figure out what comes next when unexpected things happen. There are plenty of options and courses of action for everything unexpected that comes your way.
  • Never forget – you are smart and you are resourceful. Keep moving toward the goal of moving your aging parents (one way or the other) and you will succeed.

3 Responses

  1. Could not agree more with the part about the power of attorney. This is such a hugely important document to have, and anyone who has ever been the caregiver for their aging parents knows that there are a lot of things that you simply cannot do without it.
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  3. The Power of Attorney is critical. There are variations, however, so as hard as it is to do, read it. A general power will usually terminate when the maker (the parent) becomes incompetent. A durable power will survive this occurrence, but some of these durable POAs are written to take affect only after the elder becomes incompetent, and require letters from 2 doctors to that effect. Know what you have and what it can do before making too many plans. State laws vary, so be sure to review the document's utility in both states, or revise it after the move.