The difficult decision that you dreaded for so long finally came: Your elderly parents are not able to live in their own home anymore and they must move either into a nursing home, assisted living quarters or into one of their children's homes. Wherever you decide (you meaning, your parents, you, and your siblings) decide is the best place for them to live, realize that it will be difficult for them to make the move. In this article I will present 4 reasons why it is difficult for your aging parents to move out of their old house so you will understand where they are coming from. When you understand their difficulties you will find it easier to relate to them and you will be able to take the necessary measures to help them make the move.
1. Grief. This is a very strong emotion that is very common in all aged people and is very difficult to handle. Whenever someone loses something that they value there is a risk that they will feel grief. A little child feels grief when they lose a pet, an adult feels grief when a friend passes away and your elderly parent will feel grief when they have to move away from their house, their neighborhood or just to part with their possessions that were a part of their lives for many many years.
2. Loss of independence and control. As long as your elderly parents lived by themselves they enjoyed some degree of independence and control over how they ran their live. They decided when they would eat their meals, how they would spend their time, and there was no one looking over their shoulders to see what they bought. When they move from their house, no matter where they move to, either a nursing home or your home they now are not their own masters but must play by someone else's rules. This is very difficult to deal with
3. If they move in with their children there is the added problem of role reversal; until now they were the parents and provided care for their children. Now, things are reversed, and the child takes care of them. This is very hard on certain people.
4. Overwhelmed. Moving, at any age, takes a lot of work. It entails throwing things out, selling things, Closing bank accounts and opening new ones (if they move to a new city), and fixing up the old house to get it ready for sale. They sometimes simply don't know where to start so they freeze.
In short, you have to understand and remember that there are many reasons why it IS difficult for elderly parents to move out of their house and move somewhere else. Figure out the reasons that are applicable in your personal situation you will be able to lessen the difficulties that you parents are experiencing.
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By Shevach Pepper
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