By Suzanne McPherson
Is your elderly loved one in desperate need of care? Are you concerned for them living in their own home? Are you worried about their safety? Running a home takes time, money and much decision making. As we age, our priorities change along with what we are now able to do and not do. Often times our house, and our personal safety, begins to crumble around us and we don't even see it.
Many times our aged loved ones deteriorating health goes unnoticed until something catastrophic happens. Commonly this is a fall, or perhaps the stove was left on. Sometimes the furnace is not working and our loved one doesn't seem to understand why they are cold, and do not notify us. When the problem becomes evident, we need to consider an alternate living situation. Perhaps seeing this coming, is what prevents people from telling those that can help them.
Our elderly loved ones are very independent. They have survived some of the worst times in history and are certain they can continue to do so. It is never easy to convince them that after all these years of struggling, there is now a simpler way to live. The unfortunate part is not that they need help, but that they have waited to long to make this shift and most will resent the move at this stage. Centurions will tell you, that the reason they have lived so long, is their ability to accept change in their lives and in the world.
Do your homework. Find a facility that is near where they are living now, or a place that is near family. If there are no openings, get their name on a waiting list. Do not wait for their approval to do this, you may be wasting precious time if you do. This may seem like a sneaky way to do things but realize that you, not your loved one, understands the severity of the problems they are having. Look for a place that not only has good care, but is clean. Make appointments and tour several facilities. Go early and seek out residents you can talk to about their experience living in that particular place. Inquire as to care, meals, occupational therapy, and housekeeping. Keep in mind that most residents may feel they too do not need the care that is offered there.
Approach your loved one with kindness and understanding. Changes are not easy for the elderly to accept. Take time to tell them what you have learned, but don't give them so many details that they can't take it all in. Let them know your intentions are to have them live in a place where they receive meals, social activities as well as help with bathing and medications. Remind them that you will come to see them, and make a commitment, what ever time you can afford, and then make sure you do it. Do not speak for other people regarding visiting, you only know what you are willing to do. Assure them that you will be in touch with the place they choose, and should there be a problem, you will handle it on their behalf. Find time to be with them and the transition will be smoother.
I have been taking care of elderly family for many years. After going through the process to keep them safe outside of their own homes, I have learned a practical way to research and approach the subject. It is never easy to make a change and it is especially difficult to admit to needing personal help. I discuss alternative healing methods on my blog at http://www.zenergygal.com Watch for my forthcoming book to learn how to Tweak Your Health.